Shelby Musial

Life is full for this born-and-raised Central Oregon mom, with two kids, two dogs and a cat named Tater Tot.

Family comes first.

All families are unique. Tell us about yours.

My husband Marty and I were both born and raised in Bend, as were both of our children. My husband and I met when we were 13 years old and were best friends both going to Redmond High. We got together when we were 26 years old. He is a contractor and started his own company, Northwest Painting and Restoration, in 2009. He has worked in the field for 24 years and is amazing at what he does.

I have raised my stepson Chase since he was 3 years old, and we have had full custody. Chase is now 16 and goes to Ridgeview High School. He’s a junior this year and works at Taco Bell in Bend. He got his license this year and bought his own SUV.

Charlie is our youngest son who is 8 years old. He was born at 27 weeks and had to be in the NICU for three months. They thought he would not survive the night or would have significant brain damage. He was called the miracle boy of the NICU — he had no brain bleeds, and the only problem as of now is his vision. Our family likes to call him the boy that lived. He goes to Tumalo Elementary and is in third grade.

We live in Tumalo and have owned our home for 7 years now. We have two dogs: a goldendoodle named Milly and a Chihuahua mix puppy named Javi. We also have a cat named Tater Tot.

Every family has its own traditions, rituals or inside jokes. What is one of yours?

We all eat dinner together at night and put phones away.

When did you know you wanted to be a mom?

I knew I wanted to be a mom when Chase entered my life and I took over being his mom. He was so little, and I just fell in love with him. I knew I wanted to have another child, especially watching Marty with him. We had Charlie when Chase was 8. We also had another baby boy who we lost in 2021 when I was 7 months pregnant.

Tell us about one of your proudest mom moments.

My proudest mom moment was when Charlie was 5, when we learned he passed all the tests and was developmentally on schedule. It was a huge relief for my husband and me, as they told us if any disabilities and brain damage did occur, we would see it by 5 years of age.

Now tell us about one of your most humbling mom moments.

My most humbling mom moment was watching my baby in the NICU and having to leave him every night to go home. I would go in every morning at 8 a.m. and sit there with him all day. I couldn’t breastfeed but I pumped all the time for him and would leave my milk at the NICU. He had a feeding tube the first six weeks of his life. He never latched because he got used to bottle feeding. I remember leaving there one night crying to my husband, what if he doesn’t know I’m his mom? He has all his nurses and I don’t get to be with him through the night. And just watching him fight for his life. This humbled me.

What are the most surprising things you have found wedged between the sofa cushions or behind a car seat?

Dirty socks, nerf gun bullets and food.

We’re all moms so we know that no one is perfect all of the time, or even some of the time. Tell us about your most recent “Mother of the Year” moment. You know, like forgetting to pick the kids up from school.

I’d say when Charlie lost his last tooth and we totally forgot about the Tooth Fairy…and I work for a kids’ dental office. He woke up and said, “Mom, my tooth is still there.” In my mind I’m like OMG, I totally forgot. I said to him, “Oh man, the Tooth Fairy must have had a very busy night. I bet she comes tonight.” I made up for it of course.

What is something you swore you would never do before kids that you now do (skip showers, go to a drive through coffee in your pjs, etc.)?

Drop off at school with crazy hair, no shower and a pair of sunglasses on.

What are you enjoying the most about parenting right now?

I am enjoying watching my 16-year-old become his own man and becoming independent. Getting his first car and first job. Watching him take care of himself and blooming into this man. It’s very surreal as you raise this boy and want him to be able to spread his wings and fly, but also hard because he’s your baby and you’re not so ready.

With Charlie I’m loving just spending time with him, and he is always chatting my ear off. The questions he asks are more about life — he’s always asking why. Also he loves cooking, so he’s always asking to help me cook. Love that. He is just so happy and full of life.

Tell us about your work or volunteerism outside of the home.

I have worked at Bluefish Dental and Orthodontics for 15 years now with Dr. Catherine Quas. I work up front as a patient account specialist and treatment coordinator. I love what I do and working with children. Our patient families have become like family, seeing the children grow over the last 15 years.

If mom’s not happy, nobody’s happy.

Tell us about your upbringing. How did it shape the mother you are today?

I was born in Bend and moved to Redmond when I was 5 years old. I was an only child. I was in the same school system my whole life and grew up with the same friends — some of the same friends I have today.

My mom and dad were together until I was 13, but both remained in the same town and I was very close with both. I would go shopping one weekend with my mom and her sisters. We would do girl stuff, and I had my girl time. Then the next week I would be out hunting and fishing with my Dad. He used to take me with him in my pumpkin seat as a baby and he never stopped. We would duck hunt and shoot guns. I was state champion of archery at 12. We would go to bow shoots all the time in the spring. I started hunting at age 14 when I could pull my bow back with enough poundage to hunt. I rode dirt bikes and did numerous poker runs on my dirt bike with my dad.

I also spent summers in Anaheim, California, with my mom’s mom, going to Huntington Beach, Disneyland and Knott’s Berry Farm. So I grew up in the country but had some city girl in me too. Seeing different cultures down in Cali was good for me since there wasn’t very much cultural difference in Redmond. Spending summers down there broadened my mind and way of life.

I think having one-on-one time with my mom and dad really gave me the attention

I needed. I try to do this with my boys by giving them both individual attention. Being outside always has made me happy. My love for motocross and riding dirt bikes has rubbed off on my boys. I love watching them get the same joy from riding as I did.

What is something you will NEVER do again?

I will never go out fishing in the ocean. I was so sea sick for ten hours.

Which good habit do you wish you started earlier?

Working out every morning. The energy I get from morning workouts is amazing and just starts my day off right.

What is one thing you never had that you want for your kids?

One thing I never had that I want for my kids is traveling. We’ve traveled all over Oregon and Cali, but I want them to travel the world and to see what’s out there in other countries and how different cultures live.

What keeps you up at night (apart from kids, of course)?

Finances or worrying about my Dad who is single and alone. Thinking of the future and what it holds.

What keeps you sane? My kids keep me sane and my husband. My home. Walking in the door and just being home. Also cooking keeps me sane. I love to cook for my family and have family meal time. Just the laughter in our house and comfort.

What’s your guilty pleasure? (dark chocolate hidden in the pantry, TJ Maxx, daily latte habit?)

My guilty pleasure is food, probably sweets: homemade cookies and cakes. My son Chase makes the best brownies.

What is your greatest extravagance?

My face cream. I’m 41 and not getting any younger.

Who is your favorite real-life hero?

My mom. She is a hard worker, independent, loving, kind and always puts everyone before herself. She makes sure we all feel special and has a special relationship with me, my husband and my kids. She always picks up little things to let us know she is thinking of us. She came from a family of seven and has been such a hard worker. She has been able to afford many things by selling and fixing up houses. She is so kind to everyone.

Listen to mom.

Is motherhood what you expected? What surprised you the most?

Yes motherhood is everything I expected. The unconditional love you get from your children and watching them grow — my heart is full. The surprise is how fast it goes by: you think 18 years is a long time, but man it goes by fast.

What’s the best advice you’ve received from another mom? My mom told me about teenagers: don’t take it personally. They will grow out of this stage and come back to you. I am having a hard time not being “cool” right now.

A patient’s mom at work told me the other day, they give them their license at 16 so you get used to them not being home and to prepare you for them leaving. That way it’s not as much of a shock when they leave the nest. It made me feel better.

What message would you like to share with other moms? Remember to tell it like it is.

It’s okay to not be okay. It’s also okay to take a moment for yourself when you need it. We are people, too, and to not lose yourself and just become a mom. It’s okay to have date nights and girl nights. To be yourself. All moms mess up and no one is perfect.

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MOM’s favorite…

Tell us about your favorite…

…place to find some peace & quiet: In nature, out walking on my property or just outside anywhere.

…binge-worthy TV or podcast: Game of Thrones, The White Lotus, Shameless, Entourage, The Housewife series

…way to get out of making dinner: Sports, LOL

…time-saving app or digital tool: Instacart

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MOMs love local…

We love locally owned businesses, restaurants, places and organizations. Share your favorite…

…coffee spot: Not a fancy coffee drinker, but I love the scones at Tite Knot Craft Coffee in Redmond.

…spot to get a good workout:

Smith Rock, Pilot Butte

…restaurant to take the kids: Tumalo Feed Company, The Bite Tumalo

…restaurants for a date night: Tumalo Feed Company, Brickhouse in Bend

…meetup spot for happy hour: Black Steer Steakhouse, Hola!

…local park where kids can let off steam: Pine Nursery Park

…event in your community: Tumulo school events

…any other local places you love: Roberts Bay at Prineville Reservoir, Cultus Lake, Corbett Sno-Park

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