Learn to respond, not react
When children are young, they eagerly share stories about their days. Parents can nurture these conversations to continue that connection through the teenage years and beyond.
Our emotions strongly influence how we respond when children tell us things. It can trigger fear, a desire to quickly offer advice, correct the behavior or solve the problem. Over time, these reactions can lead children to share less. A helpful practice is to respond rather than react.
Reactions are reflexive; responses are thoughtful and intentional. Before entering a sensitive discussion, take a deep breath, nod or simply say “uh-huh.” These small pauses create space to listen and understand your child’s perspective.
When children feel understood rather than judged, they are more likely to keep talking. Reflect back what you hear and ask questions before offering advice. For example:
Instead of: He’s a jerk. I warned you not to be friends with him.
Try: It sounds like that upset you. How do you think you will respond when you see him tomorrow in class?
By listening attentively and managing our emotions, we build a foundation of trust that keeps communication open through every stage of childhood.
1170 Pearl St., Eugene
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Brought to you by:
Dani Emrick
Certified Parenting through Change Group Leader
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