Helping kids when a pet dies

Saying goodbye to a beloved pet, whether they have fur or feathers, can be hard in so many ways. As a parent it can be difficult helping your young humans navigate the feelings, especially while processing your own.

If you’ve gone through the painstaking decision for euthanasia with your veterinarian, you might wonder, how do I explain this to the kids, and what words do I use? Are they old enough to be there?

You know your children best with their different ages and temperaments. However, research (and my experience) supports that honesty is the best policy. Using phrases like “going to sleep,” or, “we lost him,” can backfire later and be scary for a child. Tales like, “We took her to a farm,” can manifest later in life (usually college) as a form of betrayal.

Though it is painful to say, “We are going to give a drug that will stop his heart,” it is worth it to clarify explicitly that your pet won’t be alive anymore. This can build trust with your children you will need later, as death is a part of life.

In grief, it can be healing for you and your children to commemorate your pet. Making a photo album, planting a memorial flower or tree, or making a donation to shelter pets in their honor can help process the emotions.

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In partnership with Willamette Veterinary Hospital

& Ark Animal Hospital

Josiah Moses, DVM

Eastgate Veterinary Clinic